Its been a wonderful holiday weekend. I missed not seeing my family on the holiday, but christmas should make up for that.
On the walk to the subway I passed a parade and walked through some festival.
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Mission retrieval
Friday, November 28, 2008
Kitty sitting
I got a guess pass to Angela and Devin's gym today. We went and worked out and had a hot tub. Nice day.
Watts Towers for Thanksgiving
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
Simple Pleasure
Last night was a perfect night in my life. As I left work it began to rain. It was dark and a tinge on the gloomy side. I was listening to the Ron Reagan show on am 1150 and driving home with my thoughts. Hollywood looks so much nicer in the rain. The layer of grime is almost removed and the dull light helps to filter out that which you don't always need to see.
I Don't recall what the show was about and it doesn't really matter. I was thinking about the piece of writing I started during the day, as if under a spell.
I adore having projects in my head. So many of them stay that way entirely, but they are just as important to me as the ones that come out. To be able to turn an idea over and over in my head is magic and meditation at the same time. I get myself so carried away sometimes. With this going on my drive home was over before I realized it.
There was princess parking in front of our building when I pulled up. Angela was home waiting when I got in, just finishing up her chores and projects of her own. We hugged and compared notes about our days.
At 6:30 Angela had a house call to make, one block over on Ogden. I changed into my running clothes and walked her to her appointment. There was no rain at this point, just the smell of wet and wonder.
As Angela and I said goodbye out front of her house call I started my run. I was a tiny bit sore from the run the day before so I started very slowly. Often when I run concentrate on deep full breathing and muscle relaxation. I did this for the first mile or so as I ran down Santa Monica Blvd, letting go of another day at work, getting the kinks out of my body and mind.
My mind again began to drift towards my novel project. I was thinking about the summer in which it's set and about all the people that drifted in and out of my life during that time.
Soon structured thought crumbled away. I was left with the lights around me and the rhythm of my body at run. At Peace. The rain threatened to return, and I hoped it would.
At home I shower and dressed. I was awaiting Angela's text so that I could walk her home from her house call. I tried on first a pin striped shirt, white tie and Armani sweater. Something about it was too much. I tried on a new blue and black sweater, it also didn't fit my mood. It's an amazing feeling to love ones wardrobe. I went through many years of hating my clothes. It's now a priority in my life to enjoy the clothes I have to wear. I finally settled on a nice black long sleeve undershirt and a shirt which says "Arms are for Hugging the Dandy Warhols". I put a hat and scarf on top of this and walked on block over to meet Angela.
It had rained while I was in the shower, so again everything was wet.
As we walked home I asked her how work had been. She smiled and told me.
Angela had decided earlier in the day that she would treat us to a nice dinner out with the money she made from her house call. She usually cooks wonderful perfectly flavored meals at home. This would be a nice treat, but the bar was very high for the meal out to live up to.
We decided that we should walk to dinner and enjoy the lovely weather, and also feel free to have a drink and not have to drive or pay for a cab. We chose Cheebo on Sunset, a restaurant that neither of us had ever been to. It's the closest eatery north of our house.
The walk through the light drizzle to Cheebo was wonderful. We talked of many things and had our usual fun.
Inside Cheebo was crisp, cozy and warm. We poured over the menu and ordered two beers. We settled on Rigatoni w/ Sausage and Mushrooms in a Cream Sauce, and a Pepperoni Pizza. The Pasta was to D.I.E.! We had a very pleasant candle lit dinner.
While we were in the establishment it began to rain hard. This excited us. Our walk home was wet but not to the point of annoyance. As Angela pointed out, "How often do you get to walk in the rain when you don't have to go any where but home?"
Indeed.
I Don't recall what the show was about and it doesn't really matter. I was thinking about the piece of writing I started during the day, as if under a spell.
I adore having projects in my head. So many of them stay that way entirely, but they are just as important to me as the ones that come out. To be able to turn an idea over and over in my head is magic and meditation at the same time. I get myself so carried away sometimes. With this going on my drive home was over before I realized it.
There was princess parking in front of our building when I pulled up. Angela was home waiting when I got in, just finishing up her chores and projects of her own. We hugged and compared notes about our days.
At 6:30 Angela had a house call to make, one block over on Ogden. I changed into my running clothes and walked her to her appointment. There was no rain at this point, just the smell of wet and wonder.
As Angela and I said goodbye out front of her house call I started my run. I was a tiny bit sore from the run the day before so I started very slowly. Often when I run concentrate on deep full breathing and muscle relaxation. I did this for the first mile or so as I ran down Santa Monica Blvd, letting go of another day at work, getting the kinks out of my body and mind.
My mind again began to drift towards my novel project. I was thinking about the summer in which it's set and about all the people that drifted in and out of my life during that time.
Soon structured thought crumbled away. I was left with the lights around me and the rhythm of my body at run. At Peace. The rain threatened to return, and I hoped it would.
At home I shower and dressed. I was awaiting Angela's text so that I could walk her home from her house call. I tried on first a pin striped shirt, white tie and Armani sweater. Something about it was too much. I tried on a new blue and black sweater, it also didn't fit my mood. It's an amazing feeling to love ones wardrobe. I went through many years of hating my clothes. It's now a priority in my life to enjoy the clothes I have to wear. I finally settled on a nice black long sleeve undershirt and a shirt which says "Arms are for Hugging the Dandy Warhols". I put a hat and scarf on top of this and walked on block over to meet Angela.
It had rained while I was in the shower, so again everything was wet.
As we walked home I asked her how work had been. She smiled and told me.
Angela had decided earlier in the day that she would treat us to a nice dinner out with the money she made from her house call. She usually cooks wonderful perfectly flavored meals at home. This would be a nice treat, but the bar was very high for the meal out to live up to.
We decided that we should walk to dinner and enjoy the lovely weather, and also feel free to have a drink and not have to drive or pay for a cab. We chose Cheebo on Sunset, a restaurant that neither of us had ever been to. It's the closest eatery north of our house.
The walk through the light drizzle to Cheebo was wonderful. We talked of many things and had our usual fun.
Inside Cheebo was crisp, cozy and warm. We poured over the menu and ordered two beers. We settled on Rigatoni w/ Sausage and Mushrooms in a Cream Sauce, and a Pepperoni Pizza. The Pasta was to D.I.E.! We had a very pleasant candle lit dinner.
While we were in the establishment it began to rain hard. This excited us. Our walk home was wet but not to the point of annoyance. As Angela pointed out, "How often do you get to walk in the rain when you don't have to go any where but home?"
Indeed.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
The Brandon 500
This is the 500th post. Some of my posts barely count and others are epic. I say that my blogs average 223 words. Interesting math huh? I just made it up.
Today I started something. I started writing a novel, or perhaps a novella. I haven't figured that out. It's loosely based on the event of my life the summer I graduated from high school. Is it a young mans coming of age story? Perhaps... Is it a story of drunken juvenile behavior? Most likely.
I don't know why I have always wanted to write about that summer, or why I decided this week to do it now.
I don't know that I'll finish it, or that I'll get very far. I certainly have my doubts about weather it will be any good but I've started it.
I'm already having some difficulty in deciding how based on real life it will be. 10 years after the fact it can't be based to greatly on reality. The characters will be similar to some of the people in them, but they won't be so familiar after all this time. I will certain take many liberties with myself.
It's exciting none the less and it gives me something to think about, as if I ever had a shortage of that.
Today I started something. I started writing a novel, or perhaps a novella. I haven't figured that out. It's loosely based on the event of my life the summer I graduated from high school. Is it a young mans coming of age story? Perhaps... Is it a story of drunken juvenile behavior? Most likely.
I don't know why I have always wanted to write about that summer, or why I decided this week to do it now.
I don't know that I'll finish it, or that I'll get very far. I certainly have my doubts about weather it will be any good but I've started it.
I'm already having some difficulty in deciding how based on real life it will be. 10 years after the fact it can't be based to greatly on reality. The characters will be similar to some of the people in them, but they won't be so familiar after all this time. I will certain take many liberties with myself.
It's exciting none the less and it gives me something to think about, as if I ever had a shortage of that.
Monday, November 24, 2008
Have a look... See
Good Morning. I've been blogging a lot lately and I'm only 2 posts away from 500 so I am going to throw up a bunch of pictures here today to pad my stats.
Angela and I feel that this is how Simone looks best, with no ears... you be the judge.
Frusciante has had a very full day at this point, he can't be expected to look perky all the time.
This lovely store is "Tiger LA" at Venice and La Brea. Grr!
This is how Frusciante gets so tired.
Craig's new dog Nikki is also very tired. She is a lovely rescue pup. She will take any love that you have to give. Sometimes that love makes her this sleepy though.
Nikki and I pal around in the office.
Bridget and I pal around in the office.
Buddy does his impression of me in the office.
Here is a bottle of 1978 Dom Perignon that my Craig gave me as a joke. He wrongly assumed that since it was 30 years old it wouldn't be any good. However, it was refridgerated for the last 20 of those years. I had a hell of a time removing the cork but once I did there was the familiar pop and then the taste of liquid gold. Okay, so it maybe was a Tiny bit past it's prime but how could I tell? We drank it lovingly.
A face anyone could love.
Pink Light bulbs! Amazing! Where you ask can you find pink light bulbs? Sunday we went to a crazy estate sale. This woman must have lived in this same house since the 40's and collected pink light bulbs the whole time by the look of it.
Here are some lovely glasses which Angela purchased for 8 dollars. The estate sale was made even more odd by the fact that the entire staff running the sale happened to be hearing impaired. I wonder if that was by chance or design? You can't haggle so well with a language barrier. I did haggle the glasses down from 10$ to 8$ by simple showing the man the cash. He looked at the cash and the glasses, then he grabbed the money and hit me with it. He then smiled and nodded yes. It was adorable.
After a long day people and kitties get tired. You do to.
Angela and I feel that this is how Simone looks best, with no ears... you be the judge.
Frusciante has had a very full day at this point, he can't be expected to look perky all the time.
This lovely store is "Tiger LA" at Venice and La Brea. Grr!
This is how Frusciante gets so tired.
Craig's new dog Nikki is also very tired. She is a lovely rescue pup. She will take any love that you have to give. Sometimes that love makes her this sleepy though.
Nikki and I pal around in the office.
Bridget and I pal around in the office.
Buddy does his impression of me in the office.
Here is a bottle of 1978 Dom Perignon that my Craig gave me as a joke. He wrongly assumed that since it was 30 years old it wouldn't be any good. However, it was refridgerated for the last 20 of those years. I had a hell of a time removing the cork but once I did there was the familiar pop and then the taste of liquid gold. Okay, so it maybe was a Tiny bit past it's prime but how could I tell? We drank it lovingly.
A face anyone could love.
Pink Light bulbs! Amazing! Where you ask can you find pink light bulbs? Sunday we went to a crazy estate sale. This woman must have lived in this same house since the 40's and collected pink light bulbs the whole time by the look of it.
Here are some lovely glasses which Angela purchased for 8 dollars. The estate sale was made even more odd by the fact that the entire staff running the sale happened to be hearing impaired. I wonder if that was by chance or design? You can't haggle so well with a language barrier. I did haggle the glasses down from 10$ to 8$ by simple showing the man the cash. He looked at the cash and the glasses, then he grabbed the money and hit me with it. He then smiled and nodded yes. It was adorable.
After a long day people and kitties get tired. You do to.
Friday, November 21, 2008
Sleepytown
I'm listening to a new song by my brother Devin. It's called Sleepytown. For those of you who read both of our blogs you will have already noticed Devin blogged about it this week. I was lucky enough to hear it once last night at his apartment. It's rough and the mix needs some work but the song itself is really all that matters at this point and as far as things I've heard by people I know i enjoy this hands down the most.
Perhaps it's because I come from the same place as my brother. I can Identify with the characters in this song. I understand the yearnings of living in a sleepytown.
More than identifying with the content of the song it's the melody, It's undeniable in the chorus. There is emotion dripping through the auto-tune, and that is no small feat. I want to be a part of this song, but I can also understand that Devin needs to sink and swim on his own musically for a while. Devin is by far the most truly motivated musician that I have ever had the pleasure to work with. The secret to Devin's success though is that he loves it, and he will continue to get better at writing songs and recording them because he enjoys it so much.
This song and Modern Life, which I was lucky enough to hear earlier in this year represent a sort of culmination for Devin. Everything he's been listening to and everything he's learned from his work in his current band have taught him how to do a great deal within the construct of a five minute pop song. Smash that knowledge against the new frontier of singing and writing the lyrics and you get the possibility of magic.
Godspeed Devin. I feel proud to be your little brother.
Perhaps it's because I come from the same place as my brother. I can Identify with the characters in this song. I understand the yearnings of living in a sleepytown.
More than identifying with the content of the song it's the melody, It's undeniable in the chorus. There is emotion dripping through the auto-tune, and that is no small feat. I want to be a part of this song, but I can also understand that Devin needs to sink and swim on his own musically for a while. Devin is by far the most truly motivated musician that I have ever had the pleasure to work with. The secret to Devin's success though is that he loves it, and he will continue to get better at writing songs and recording them because he enjoys it so much.
This song and Modern Life, which I was lucky enough to hear earlier in this year represent a sort of culmination for Devin. Everything he's been listening to and everything he's learned from his work in his current band have taught him how to do a great deal within the construct of a five minute pop song. Smash that knowledge against the new frontier of singing and writing the lyrics and you get the possibility of magic.
Godspeed Devin. I feel proud to be your little brother.
Ups
It's now dark when I get off work. I really don't like that. I really don't understand daylight saving time. It really musses things up for me. I had for the past 8 months been enjoying the routine of stopping off on my way home from work to run on soft dirt and steep hills each day the sun and the earth had been slowly adjusting their positions which was allowing for a nice variety in temperature and light quality. Then of course humans threw their hand in and in that hand was an axe. Like most things human their was no subtle action involved. Chop Chop. Suddenly in one adjustment from those meddling hands my evenings were changed. Too dark now to run on steep hills and soft dirt.
I'm now left running on concrete and through traffic on much flatter surfaces. It's not so peaceful but its not horrid. I am just glad that I am still enjoying it 9 months in. In fact I still love to run. It's such a nice feeling and I feel better all the way around in life because of it.
Last week when one of my bosses was ill I found myself needing to get to work a bit earlier. I suppose it makes up for all the times I was late in the years prior to this one. I started setting my alarm a little earlier each day and would you know I didn't totally hate it? I wasn't completely exhausted, or any more so than I usually am at the end of day. I actually like it. So last Friday even though the boss was back in good Health I still woke up early. I didn't though rush off to work. I walked into the living room near two sleeping cats and started to do some push ups and sit ups. It was nice. Having worked my lower body so much in the past year my upper body was starting to get jealous.
I have continued this new morning exercise routine all of this week. It's been very nice to me. I feel much better throughout the early part of my day. I eat better in the mornings and for lunch having put in the time to work on improving my physical condition.
It's all around ups.
Keep it ups.
I'm now left running on concrete and through traffic on much flatter surfaces. It's not so peaceful but its not horrid. I am just glad that I am still enjoying it 9 months in. In fact I still love to run. It's such a nice feeling and I feel better all the way around in life because of it.
Last week when one of my bosses was ill I found myself needing to get to work a bit earlier. I suppose it makes up for all the times I was late in the years prior to this one. I started setting my alarm a little earlier each day and would you know I didn't totally hate it? I wasn't completely exhausted, or any more so than I usually am at the end of day. I actually like it. So last Friday even though the boss was back in good Health I still woke up early. I didn't though rush off to work. I walked into the living room near two sleeping cats and started to do some push ups and sit ups. It was nice. Having worked my lower body so much in the past year my upper body was starting to get jealous.
I have continued this new morning exercise routine all of this week. It's been very nice to me. I feel much better throughout the early part of my day. I eat better in the mornings and for lunch having put in the time to work on improving my physical condition.
It's all around ups.
Keep it ups.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
A picture worth $25,000,000,000.00
I just saw this picture on the Huffington Post. I can't find the story it's linked from but I assume since it's under the same heading as the proposed automobile maker bailout that it's something to do with their begging session in congress. Can someone tell me for sure?
At any rate I find this picture absolutely, completely hilarious. Only truly serious people can laugh, and this is really the funniest it gets. OH MY ME!
Another sign of the times, frowning fat cats.
Do you think they practiced?
Monday, November 17, 2008
Funny Circles
Sometimes when I'm missing me I go read in my blog about what I was doing or thinking during this time of year in a previous year. It's a good exercise. It allows me to remember what a fool I am capable of being and it also allows me to recognize progress. It's like those helpful telephone poles on the side of a road. Except for when you go crashing into one as I have done in the past, then they are not so helpful... Forgive me, I've run on.
Today I went back to 2005 and was happy to find that I had blogged on the 17th of November that year. I always enjoy reading a post from exactly the same day in a year past. This particular one was funny to me. It was entitled "Some Words on Words and Reading"
I still pretty much believe what I believed on that day about this particular subject and I don't have much more to report, except my little stab at book clubs. Oh my me, would you believe I have come so far as to now be a member of a book club? In it's defense it's a very small book club. We are currently reading Raymond Chandlers "The Long Goodbye". I'm only a chapter in, having just picked it up yesterday but I like it very much already.
This blog also made me really want to find another copy of "The Wind in the Willows" to take Kansas City with me.
Yes, I'm going to Kansas City in December and I'm so frickin' excited I can hardly stand it. I can't even begin to make these little digital letters tell you how much it warms the heart to think about a holiday with my family. I am so grateful to have my family, truly my life has been blessed.
perhaps some year coming I will look back on this little blog and be reminded of this feeling when I really need it. How about that?
Thanks to Adrienne for the picture of royal. He was travelin' with the family on the way to see Caity perform in her high school musical. I can't wait to meet this little guy.
Today I went back to 2005 and was happy to find that I had blogged on the 17th of November that year. I always enjoy reading a post from exactly the same day in a year past. This particular one was funny to me. It was entitled "Some Words on Words and Reading"
I still pretty much believe what I believed on that day about this particular subject and I don't have much more to report, except my little stab at book clubs. Oh my me, would you believe I have come so far as to now be a member of a book club? In it's defense it's a very small book club. We are currently reading Raymond Chandlers "The Long Goodbye". I'm only a chapter in, having just picked it up yesterday but I like it very much already.
This blog also made me really want to find another copy of "The Wind in the Willows" to take Kansas City with me.
Yes, I'm going to Kansas City in December and I'm so frickin' excited I can hardly stand it. I can't even begin to make these little digital letters tell you how much it warms the heart to think about a holiday with my family. I am so grateful to have my family, truly my life has been blessed.
perhaps some year coming I will look back on this little blog and be reminded of this feeling when I really need it. How about that?
Thanks to Adrienne for the picture of royal. He was travelin' with the family on the way to see Caity perform in her high school musical. I can't wait to meet this little guy.
Sunday, November 16, 2008
The red light glow
I'm sitting outside in front of our apartment next to a small fountain that bubbles softly. I can hear three different televisions coming from neighboring apartments. I cannot make out a word from a warble.
I'm sore today. I worked at my bosses house yesterday. She had a storage shed that needed to be emptied. I moved the entire contents of the shed into the house and the garage. I lifted crate upon crate up a ladder and into a loft type area. I am sore today but it feels nice.
One of the televisions around me has now made itself distinct. I hear the play by play of a football game but I have no idea whose playing. especially at this hour.
My two favorite neighbors just returned. They allowed their doggie out to come say hello. It was very nice.
Last night we went to the drive-in. We saw role models and I slept through a good part of hellboy 2. The movie was good but I was beat. Normally Angela falls asleep at the drive-in.
Off I go.
Friday, November 14, 2008
My Uncle Unknown... To Me
Pictured above, left to Right, My Mother, My Uncle Randy & My Aunt Sharon.
I don't know where this picture was taken, from the land scape and the time frame though I would have to say it was taken outside of Natoma, Kansas. The Hand writting here that was scanned in along with picture is that of my Cousin's Great-Grandmother, Ada. Ada marks the year as 1966, the kodak stamp on the front though is Aug 1965, which I don't think actually has anything to do with when the picture was taken or developed.
This picture is sad, because as you can tell from the writing on the back Randy died shortly after it was taken. He drown in a lake outside of Natoma.
I have always been curious about Randy. I've seen only a handful of pictures and from my Mom and Ronnie I've learned various bits about his character. He seemed to be a great little guy.
There is no way for me to really understand what his life meant nor what his passing took. I can only take a look at his brother and sisters that survived and imagine what could have been.
I can't fathom the idea of losing one of my siblings. They are such a part of me that I would never feel whole again.
I love Sharon's Children and Ronnies daughter greatly, to think that perhaps there could be another family of children like them, that would have been something.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
The Chitter Chatter
It a bit chilly this morning. It's even a bit cold to type. I have a fresh cup of coffee on the desk to my left. A top my head is a black hat and around my neck is a black and red checkered scarf. It's California for crying out loud, but we have recently learned just how cold it can be here. It's been now one week since our state voted to take away a fundamental right from some of our best citizens.
I've just viewed Kieth Olbermans Special Comment on the passing of Prop 8. You could view it here:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/3036677/vp/27652443#27652443
and for those who prefer to read:
Everyone deserves the same chance at permanence and happiness
Finally tonight as promised, a Special Comment on the passage, last week, of Proposition Eight in California, which rescinded the right of same-sex couples to marry, and tilted the balance on this issue, from coast to coast.
Some parameters, as preface. This isn't about yelling, and this isn't about politics, and this isn't really just about Prop-8. And I don't have a personal investment in this: I'm not gay, I had to strain to think of one member of even my very extended family who is, I have no personal stories of close friends or colleagues fighting the prejudice that still pervades their lives.
And yet to me this vote is horrible. Horrible. Because this isn't about yelling, and this isn't about politics. This is about the human heart, and if that sounds corny, so be it.
If you voted for this Proposition or support those who did or the sentiment they expressed, I have some questions, because, truly, I do not understand. Why does this matter to you? What is it to you? In a time of impermanence and fly-by-night relationships, these people over here want the same chance at permanence and happiness that is your option. They don't want to deny you yours. They don't want to take anything away from you. They want what you want—a chance to be a little less alone in the world.
Only now you are saying to them—no. You can't have it on these terms. Maybe something similar. If they behave. If they don't cause too much trouble. You'll even give them all the same legal rights—even as you're taking away the legal right, which they already had. A world around them, still anchored in love and marriage, and you are saying, no, you can't marry. What if somebody passed a law that said you couldn't marry?
I keep hearing this term "re-defining" marriage. If this country hadn't re-defined marriage, black people still couldn't marry white people. Sixteen states had laws on the books which made that illegal in 1967. 1967.
The parents of the President-Elect of the United States couldn't have married in nearly one third of the states of the country their son grew up to lead. But it's worse than that. If this country had not "re-defined" marriage, some black people still couldn't marry black people. It is one of the most overlooked and cruelest parts of our sad story of slavery. Marriages were not legally recognized, if the people were slaves. Since slaves were property, they could not legally be husband and wife, or mother and child. Their marriage vows were different: not "Until Death, Do You Part," but "Until Death or Distance, Do You Part." Marriages among slaves were not legally recognized.
You know, just like marriages today in California are not legally recognized, if the people are gay.
And uncountable in our history are the number of men and women, forced by society into marrying the opposite sex, in sham marriages, or marriages of convenience, or just marriages of not knowing, centuries of men and women who have lived their lives in shame and unhappiness, and who have, through a lie to themselves or others, broken countless other lives, of spouses and children, all because we said a man couldn't marry another man, or a woman couldn't marry another woman. The sanctity of marriage.
How many marriages like that have there been and how on earth do they increase the "sanctity" of marriage rather than render the term, meaningless?
What is this, to you? Nobody is asking you to embrace their expression of love. But don't you, as human beings, have to embrace... that love? The world is barren enough.
It is stacked against love, and against hope, and against those very few and precious emotions that enable us to go forward. Your marriage only stands a 50-50 chance of lasting, no matter how much you feel and how hard you work.
And here are people overjoyed at the prospect of just that chance, and that work, just for the hope of having that feeling. With so much hate in the world, with so much meaningless division, and people pitted against people for no good reason, this is what your religion tells you to do? With your experience of life and this world and all its sadnesses, this is what your conscience tells you to do?
With your knowledge that life, with endless vigor, seems to tilt the playing field on which we all live, in favor of unhappiness and hate... this is what your heart tells you to do? You want to sanctify marriage? You want to honor your God and the universal love you believe he represents? Then Spread happiness—this tiny, symbolic, semantical grain of happiness—share it with all those who seek it. Quote me anything from your religious leader or book of choice telling you to stand against this. And then tell me how you can believe both that statement and another statement, another one which reads only "do unto others as you would have them do unto you."
You are asked now, by your country, and perhaps by your creator, to stand on one side or another. You are asked now to stand, not on a question of politics, not on a question of religion, not on a question of gay or straight. You are asked now to stand, on a question of love. All you need do is stand, and let the tiny ember of love meet its own fate.
You don't have to help it, you don't have it applaud it, you don't have to fight for it. Just don't put it out. Just don't extinguish it. Because while it may at first look like that love is between two people you don't know and you don't understand and maybe you don't even want to know. It is, in fact, the ember of your love, for your fellow person just because this is the only world we have. And the other guy counts, too.
This is the second time in ten days I find myself concluding by turning to, of all things, the closing plea for mercy by Clarence Darrow in a murder trial.
But what he said, fits what is really at the heart of this:
"I was reading last night of the aspiration of the old Persian poet, Omar-Khayyam," he told the judge. It appealed to me as the highest that I can vision. I wish it was in my heart, and I wish it was in the hearts of all: So I be written in the Book of Love; I do not care about that Book above. Erase my name, or write it as you will, So I be written in the Book of Love."
Back to me.
This has been such a hard week for so many people. This isn't an issue that is really very complicated at all. There are no logical arguments on the other side. We all know where this is going. As long as humanity is going to survive we will continue to grow in our understanding and acceptance. I'm convinced we are going to continue as a race therefore I believe in the foreseeable future this issue will be put to rest and that we will move on in a better and more understanding world. It's happening all around us. Perhaps it's all that more painful to not have it now. People are in love now. They don't want the sting of a day late and equal protection short. We need to grow up and live up to the ideals we profess to hold sacred.
I've just viewed Kieth Olbermans Special Comment on the passing of Prop 8. You could view it here:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/3036677/vp/27652443#27652443
and for those who prefer to read:
Everyone deserves the same chance at permanence and happiness
Finally tonight as promised, a Special Comment on the passage, last week, of Proposition Eight in California, which rescinded the right of same-sex couples to marry, and tilted the balance on this issue, from coast to coast.
Some parameters, as preface. This isn't about yelling, and this isn't about politics, and this isn't really just about Prop-8. And I don't have a personal investment in this: I'm not gay, I had to strain to think of one member of even my very extended family who is, I have no personal stories of close friends or colleagues fighting the prejudice that still pervades their lives.
And yet to me this vote is horrible. Horrible. Because this isn't about yelling, and this isn't about politics. This is about the human heart, and if that sounds corny, so be it.
If you voted for this Proposition or support those who did or the sentiment they expressed, I have some questions, because, truly, I do not understand. Why does this matter to you? What is it to you? In a time of impermanence and fly-by-night relationships, these people over here want the same chance at permanence and happiness that is your option. They don't want to deny you yours. They don't want to take anything away from you. They want what you want—a chance to be a little less alone in the world.
Only now you are saying to them—no. You can't have it on these terms. Maybe something similar. If they behave. If they don't cause too much trouble. You'll even give them all the same legal rights—even as you're taking away the legal right, which they already had. A world around them, still anchored in love and marriage, and you are saying, no, you can't marry. What if somebody passed a law that said you couldn't marry?
I keep hearing this term "re-defining" marriage. If this country hadn't re-defined marriage, black people still couldn't marry white people. Sixteen states had laws on the books which made that illegal in 1967. 1967.
The parents of the President-Elect of the United States couldn't have married in nearly one third of the states of the country their son grew up to lead. But it's worse than that. If this country had not "re-defined" marriage, some black people still couldn't marry black people. It is one of the most overlooked and cruelest parts of our sad story of slavery. Marriages were not legally recognized, if the people were slaves. Since slaves were property, they could not legally be husband and wife, or mother and child. Their marriage vows were different: not "Until Death, Do You Part," but "Until Death or Distance, Do You Part." Marriages among slaves were not legally recognized.
You know, just like marriages today in California are not legally recognized, if the people are gay.
And uncountable in our history are the number of men and women, forced by society into marrying the opposite sex, in sham marriages, or marriages of convenience, or just marriages of not knowing, centuries of men and women who have lived their lives in shame and unhappiness, and who have, through a lie to themselves or others, broken countless other lives, of spouses and children, all because we said a man couldn't marry another man, or a woman couldn't marry another woman. The sanctity of marriage.
How many marriages like that have there been and how on earth do they increase the "sanctity" of marriage rather than render the term, meaningless?
What is this, to you? Nobody is asking you to embrace their expression of love. But don't you, as human beings, have to embrace... that love? The world is barren enough.
It is stacked against love, and against hope, and against those very few and precious emotions that enable us to go forward. Your marriage only stands a 50-50 chance of lasting, no matter how much you feel and how hard you work.
And here are people overjoyed at the prospect of just that chance, and that work, just for the hope of having that feeling. With so much hate in the world, with so much meaningless division, and people pitted against people for no good reason, this is what your religion tells you to do? With your experience of life and this world and all its sadnesses, this is what your conscience tells you to do?
With your knowledge that life, with endless vigor, seems to tilt the playing field on which we all live, in favor of unhappiness and hate... this is what your heart tells you to do? You want to sanctify marriage? You want to honor your God and the universal love you believe he represents? Then Spread happiness—this tiny, symbolic, semantical grain of happiness—share it with all those who seek it. Quote me anything from your religious leader or book of choice telling you to stand against this. And then tell me how you can believe both that statement and another statement, another one which reads only "do unto others as you would have them do unto you."
You are asked now, by your country, and perhaps by your creator, to stand on one side or another. You are asked now to stand, not on a question of politics, not on a question of religion, not on a question of gay or straight. You are asked now to stand, on a question of love. All you need do is stand, and let the tiny ember of love meet its own fate.
You don't have to help it, you don't have it applaud it, you don't have to fight for it. Just don't put it out. Just don't extinguish it. Because while it may at first look like that love is between two people you don't know and you don't understand and maybe you don't even want to know. It is, in fact, the ember of your love, for your fellow person just because this is the only world we have. And the other guy counts, too.
This is the second time in ten days I find myself concluding by turning to, of all things, the closing plea for mercy by Clarence Darrow in a murder trial.
But what he said, fits what is really at the heart of this:
"I was reading last night of the aspiration of the old Persian poet, Omar-Khayyam," he told the judge. It appealed to me as the highest that I can vision. I wish it was in my heart, and I wish it was in the hearts of all: So I be written in the Book of Love; I do not care about that Book above. Erase my name, or write it as you will, So I be written in the Book of Love."
Back to me.
This has been such a hard week for so many people. This isn't an issue that is really very complicated at all. There are no logical arguments on the other side. We all know where this is going. As long as humanity is going to survive we will continue to grow in our understanding and acceptance. I'm convinced we are going to continue as a race therefore I believe in the foreseeable future this issue will be put to rest and that we will move on in a better and more understanding world. It's happening all around us. Perhaps it's all that more painful to not have it now. People are in love now. They don't want the sting of a day late and equal protection short. We need to grow up and live up to the ideals we profess to hold sacred.
Sunday, November 09, 2008
Meet molly
Meet me in the dark
La Torta
Konos in san diego for breakfast
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
A passing moment
I just pulled up to a stoplight at vineland and oxnard. I was paused waiting for a green. I noticed the man in the vehicle to my left looking in my direction. I smiled at him and he smiled back.
The sun is shining today and the air feels clean.
A Shamful Thing
I didn't do enough. I didn't work the phone banks and I didn't knock on doors. I Apologize to everyone who now can't marry the person they love. I didn't do enough.
I have an unclean dirty feeling today. I want to be celebrating our national victory but it's so much more an empty feeling than I could imagine.
It's a sad day for California. It won't last. Human beings will get past this, we are already so close. You can't continue to have immoral laws. We've learned this time and time again. This petty hatred is no match. History will judge the fear that has prompted this absurd action. This won't even make sense to our people in 50 years, the real kick though is that it doesn't even make sense now, it never has.
I'm sorry.
I have an unclean dirty feeling today. I want to be celebrating our national victory but it's so much more an empty feeling than I could imagine.
It's a sad day for California. It won't last. Human beings will get past this, we are already so close. You can't continue to have immoral laws. We've learned this time and time again. This petty hatred is no match. History will judge the fear that has prompted this absurd action. This won't even make sense to our people in 50 years, the real kick though is that it doesn't even make sense now, it never has.
I'm sorry.
Tuesday, November 04, 2008
I raise my glass, tip back my head and laugh. Its not a snide laugh nor an I told you so. Its a laugh of recognition, a vigorous nod to the idea that we can still as a country rise to occasion.
Tonight we have elected a man that I would be nervous to have a beer with. A man who has worked hard his entire life. A man who values the constitution of the united states of america.
Tonight we have elected a man that I would be nervous to have a beer with. A man who has worked hard his entire life. A man who values the constitution of the united states of america.
I'm nervous for Barack Obama, and I'm nervous for this country which I have never stopped loving. This is not a great time to be an american, nor an earthling. We are at critical mass. We need to be this involved from here on out, we can no longer rest on the achievements of the past. The infrastructure that those before us built is strained and needs replaced and improved. The good standing that our country once held in the world is gone and needs rebuilt but in a new inclusive spirit.
I'm so proud of everyone I know. You all worked so hard to inform each other and to remain engaged in a system that had seemed to forsake us. We need to continue to work this hard. We have to do better.
Proposition 8 is winning with 22 percent reporting. This makes is wrong. A constitutional amendment which removes a right is something the framers of our state of our country never intended. This is a very scary sign. Today it is gay marriage, what will it be next?
Projected Elected
I'm waiting to hear results on the california voter propositions.
I am so glad I'm in this moment. I'm in a room surrounded by friends sitting next to the woman I love looking forward to a new day.
Fw: I'm so excited and so nervous.
I'm so excited and so nervous. Blogging from my phone. It appears Obama has won. It appears the dark ride is coming to a close.
Fingers cross
I'm still nervous on the edge of my seat hoping we hace defeated prop 8. Crosses fingers. Crosses heart.
Will it be worth what we've all been through?
It's been bad to live in this country in the past 8 years. It's been a very dark ride. We've seen our quality of life decline and our standing in the world plummet. We have disconnected from one another. Each seperate community has become an island where generally only one way of thinking is tolerated. We have broken down into small tribes where each member is only allowed to fall on one side of what is for all purposes really an arbitrary line. Today that line is getting crossed, hopefully in a very real and tangible way.
IT's so very exciting to be me today. My sister is a volunteer poll worker in Kansas City. I've been texting her, and wouldn't you know she's already been at the center of action... here is what the news has had to say about what happened in her ward:
"In Missouri, another battleground state, at least three precincts in Kansas City's 5th Ward received the wrong registration books from election officials. Shelley McThomas, director of the city's Board of Elections, said cover jackets indicating ward, precinct and sequence numbers were mixed up when the books were assembled.
Don't Miss
"They looked like the right books, but when the judges opened them this morning they discovered, no, these pages aren't the right pages," McThomas said.
New books were printed at the Board of Elections after the discovery of the problem, and they were delivered by deputies to anxious judges and voters in the 5th Ward, she said"
She said it was chaos for the first two hours they were opened but by 8am it was all back on track. By 1:00 pm already half of the people registered in her precient had voted.
My parents voted last friday. My brother was out doing the lords work at 6am this morning speaking to people about no on prop 8.
I have to wait until 5:30 to vote this evening. I'm hoping that all the effort of so many people will have paid off. I'm hoping for an end to the dark ride we've been on. I'm hoping for hope and voting for change.
IT's so very exciting to be me today. My sister is a volunteer poll worker in Kansas City. I've been texting her, and wouldn't you know she's already been at the center of action... here is what the news has had to say about what happened in her ward:
"In Missouri, another battleground state, at least three precincts in Kansas City's 5th Ward received the wrong registration books from election officials. Shelley McThomas, director of the city's Board of Elections, said cover jackets indicating ward, precinct and sequence numbers were mixed up when the books were assembled.
Don't Miss
"They looked like the right books, but when the judges opened them this morning they discovered, no, these pages aren't the right pages," McThomas said.
New books were printed at the Board of Elections after the discovery of the problem, and they were delivered by deputies to anxious judges and voters in the 5th Ward, she said"
She said it was chaos for the first two hours they were opened but by 8am it was all back on track. By 1:00 pm already half of the people registered in her precient had voted.
My parents voted last friday. My brother was out doing the lords work at 6am this morning speaking to people about no on prop 8.
I have to wait until 5:30 to vote this evening. I'm hoping that all the effort of so many people will have paid off. I'm hoping for an end to the dark ride we've been on. I'm hoping for hope and voting for change.
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