May April

My life has changed dramatically in the past month. It will continue to change dramatically for at least the next two months as I find a new home and leave an old one behind. I'm a better person today than I was yesterday, I can say that with satisfaction and assurance. I am improving daily and getting better at being myself again. It's been sometime since I could say that with any certainty.
Life has thrown up many challenges and many rewards and I am glad to be along for the ride.
My search for a new home nearly ended this weekend, but rather than force a fit I was convinced to have faith, I can say already today that I feel I'm making a better decision. I am looking for studio apartments around hollywood, checking the daily to see what new options open before me. I picture myself with my thigns ordered around me, creating again and feeling like a human being. It's a positive time, a time to re-evaluate what is important in life and what pursuits are worthwhile. I remind my self daily in this time that it's no longer valid to operate on assumption, that each new moment should be examined on its on for exactly what it is, and that each moment should be accepted as such, with nothing taken as granted.
April is always a magical month for me, it's why I chose to steal yet again the title of this post from myself, from what may be the last S no S album, but what may very well just turn out to be the fifth of at least six. This morning, on this last day of March it I was thinking back and realizing that there was a planned 6th S no S album, entitled "The Recreation", maybe now I will take that path. At the same time I am considering creating a several new projects, and finishing several that have longs since languished in limbo due to lack of attention. I look toward this next month to be a time of continued personal growth, where I will build a new foundation from which to build a new life.
May April be as good as March.

The Use of Inappropriate Volume in Verbal Exchange

I was just asked by our book keeper who answers phones in my office while I go on break if I would like to go on my break now. I didn't want to go on my break because today I hate her and I want her to leave before I go on break so that I can be happy when I come back from that break. So rather than answer politely and have a long conversation about it I simple said in response to her question, at a volume just shy of being a shout, "NOPE". She is leaving right now. When her car pulls out I will go on break. I'm feeling happier already.

Wheels Turn

I have stopped by here today to place a bit of a marker in my blog. Things are changing in my life. I have no desire to blog these changes. This is not the kind of thing you blog about. Unless you are emotionally 14 and happen to blog on myspace.
This marker will exist as a silent monument to personal change. If I know you, and you read this blog, I think I've talked to all 5 of you... but if I missed someone you should perhaps email me. I would be surprised to learn of your existence.

I have a HUGE blister on my right foot. I went for a very long hike on Sunday and it kicked my ass. I have also been running a lot. I have been running in Nichols Canyon, on a fabulous little fire road/Trail. I don't know how long it is but it's very strenuous. I began 2 weeks ago just running up and down it. Last week I started to run up it, then back down, only to turn around at the half way point and run up the steepest part again. Friday and yesterday I was having so much fun that I just stated to run the entire thing twice. It's really a beautiful spot. The sun is setting, there is often a breeze and on a clear day you can see the entire west side all the way to the ocean.

I have been thinking a lot about writing songs again. There are melodies in my head, some of them have words. I am excited to be engaging in that again. There is so much to do in this life.